All based on true events.
1. I will not kick the GM out of my house during a game.
27. I will not make swords and arrows have the same sound effects as mech lasers and missiles.
125. I will not refuse to play a game on the single basis that "it isn't D&D".
250. I will not request to play a race not covered in the rules, nor will I imply that I will not participate otherwise.
251. I will not make such requests for my girlfriend either.
379. Samurai armor is not appropriate attire for a modern era game.
448. If the plane is crashing, I will not stay aboard and play guitar while the rest of the characters parachute out.
459. Certainly not because I think it's "funny".
460. Or because my character is based on a single silly premise which is more important than any standards of human behavior.
593. Disembodied heads - even those of Nazis - are not meant to become ventriloquist dummies just so I can use that skill on my character sheet.
665. I will not take out every manual in the collection until I find an optional rule that proves my point.
666. Certainly not the AD&D 1st ed. Manual of the Planes.
801. Why would I keep the bloody remains of smaller humanoid species in Mason jars? Answer: I would not.
928. I will not make the GM uncomfortable by putting the moves on him every time he plays a female NPC.
1001. I will not ask for the game to be moved to a Sunday morning "because it's the only time I can make it" and then not show up, especially if everyone else has a hangover.
Excerpts from 1001 Things I Will Not Do When I GM